11 non-fitness, random, offensive, thoughts
January 23, 2012 by OCstrength
Filed under Featured, Motivation Articles
It’s Monday morning, you have another week of cubicle slaving to do…manual labor to attend to, or whatever else you got going on in your life. Nobody cares (except me, of course) how shitty or great it is. It’s probably going to take you a couple of hours to get ‘in the mood’ to get the week started. So, here I am…delivering again! Just what you wanted to go along with your morning java…an awesome, funny, and completely random offensive list.
Enjoy!
1. When speaking about a sports team, it is not ‘WE’…unless, you have somehow played, coached, owned, or otherwise were employed by this sports organization. You are a fan, you are not part of the actual team. Sorry to disappoint you.
2. By posting a status update on FB, forwarding a text message, or even wearing a certain color, you are NOT doing anything to help a cause.
3. Putting a bunch of ‘pretty words’ next to a fat chick in a bikini does nothing to hide the fact that she is fat. If this wasn’t a problem, there would be no reason to make the picture to begin with.
Put some clothes on, pig nose.
4. Learn to spell and properly use the following words: their, they’re, and there. It’s quite annoying.
5. The abused animal commercials are getting on my nerves now. Seriously, do they need to play music so dark you’d think it was for a genocide taking place in a 3rd world country? For just $0.50 a day you can support this young kitten…blah, blah…bullshit! All $0.50 is going to do is provide enough money to buy the shit to euthanize him….and pay the corporate executives running the ad. Stop bullshitting.
6. Speaking of 3rd world countries…if they haven’t figured it out by now, we probably can’t help. Really. It’s been hundreds, if not thousands of years now and shit is still that horrible? I mean, shit…it’s not so great right now, but I think this country (USA) is doing fine for being a couple hundred years old. I doubt my $5 a month is going to do much, unless it’s going to an effort to dethrone the dirt bag running the ship.
7. Why is it so hard for vegans to figure this out; if it wasn’t for meat, you wouldn’t have the brain to think you’re smart by not eating it. If we weren’t supposed to eat the lil animals, God woulda FLIPPED out a long time ago. Oh, and just so you know…they’d eat your ass in a second if they had the chance.
8. I’m all for motivation quotes, thoughts, and even pictures…but, if all it takes to motivate you is a pretty picture and a few clever words…well, you get my point…
9. Paula Deen made a shitload of cash showing people how to eat like shit-pigs, with things like bread pudding made from donuts…then comes out and endorses a Type 2 Diabetes drug for another shitload of money?? Then she has the nerve to tell people to stop using so much butter? Yeah…it was the butter, ya tard!! Am I the only one that thinks this is completely insane? Someone compared the two perfectly by saying, ‘I think I’ll get into the leg breaking business…just so I can sell crutches later on’.
10. Sometimes life is going to suck. It’s the shitty times that make the good times, even better. As long as you don’t spend the majority of your waking hours walking around bitching, everyone is entitled to complain once in a while. But, don’t think that showing us a picture of some dude with 1 leg and 19 fingers, washing himself in cow piss is going to make me feel better about being broke. Actually, it’ll probably make me feel even worse now that I know I can’t help him either. Thanks, Mr. Cheer Me Up guy…
11. Stop trying to sue the airline, airport, and airplane manufacturer…just lose some damn weight, tubby. No, it isn’t fair that you get to have 2 seats because you couldn’t stop at just 19 brownies. Nobody wants your saddle bags hanging over their arm rests…on the airplane, or at the movies. Damn it!
That is all, you can get back to whatever it is you do on Monday mornings…
Stay strong!
-Mike McNeil.
Related posts:
Mike-
My son and I are doing your MMA TKO workout. We have been having fun with it and it has been a great way to spend quality time with my son.
So I challange other dads to get off there A$$ and get your kids away from the video games. Go out and spend some time with your kids cost is $0.00 and the return on investment is priceless.
Ted-